nine months

i remember last year at thanksgiving. i was waddling through a grocery store trying to find some last minute ingredients. i remember the day so well. i was big. i was tired. i was so ready to meet you. and i knew it wouldn't be very long.

i was so genuinely thankful. thankful that you were healthy. thankful for a relatively easy pregnancy. thankful that every doctor's appointment validated that you had strong heartbeats and you were so active and so alive and so well.

i remember being in love. again. with this little bug that was kicking inside my belly and who was becoming a part of my heart.

there was really no doubt. i loved you. and it made me grateful.

but i didn't know the details. i didn't know your face. i didn't know who you were. i didn't know specifically what about you i loved so much and what you'd do to me.

so today i am thankful for the details. i am thankful that i know who you are at nine months old. i can't believe that the you who was in my belly is the same you who are here with me today. knowing you is the best. the details. i love that there are nine months of details.

thank you God. thank you for knitting and forming and molding him into who is is now and into who he will be in the future. thank you so, so much. You gave me such a miraculous gift. and i can't seem to put him into words. so thank you for his sweet, big brown eyes and amazing lashes. thank you for his soft skin. thank you for his crazy hair and big head. thank you for his sweet snuggles. thank you for his loud squeals and prominent voice. thank you that he loves to giggle and be close to us. thank you that he is tough and strong. thank you that he loves to stand when supported and crawl backwards. thank you that he loves his toys and watches the same baby einstein video over and over again. thank you for his chubby cheeks and full lips. thank you that he will sit in his high chair and try every flavor of baby food we give him. thank you that he is such a love bug in the mornings. thank you that he clings to us when he's sad. thank you that he is so funny and his laugh is the most hilarious thing ever. thank you for his smiles that are quirky and cute and just so him. thank you for his pathetic but cute frown. thank you for that feeling. thank you that we get to be his parents.

caleb b. we've had nine months with you and i have to tell you, you've stolen my heart. it's yours. you light up my world. today i am thankful that the boy i loved a year ago is you. because you exceed any hope and any expectation of what i had imagined. thank you Lord.